So I’m getting ready for Alexis’s Award ceremony. My stomach has butterflies. I told her I wouldn’t be there because I didn’t want to take Alison. Then she was like it’s okay you never come to my awards. I was like I always come to your awards and she was like you haven’t in years. I didn’t realize that. I didn’t realize that depression has cost me to miss so many of my children’s high points. My social phobias can’t continue to rule me. Now I’m thinking back to the last think I went to for Ariana. I always get out of the events. I say I’m sick, or I can’t make it. When I’m around groups I feel like I’m going to pass out. I don’t understand why, I just know it happens. I better get off now, so I won’t be late.